Foxy Roxy’s Dilemma

I”m back on Storytime!

It’s been a rough couple months  recovering physically for me.   Apparently it takes longer to heal when you get older.  I know the x-rays showed no broken bones, but I almost feel like they lied.  I still have pains in the injured areas, and complications  from the injuries.  Ibuprofen is my friend.  I quit taking the pain meds and muscle relaxers pretty quickly as they rendered me into a big pile of mush that just oozed onto the sofa.

I can make it about 15 minutes on the treadmill, then my hip catches and my lower back  pain begins.  the same goes for the elliptical, or the cycle.  Trying to strengthen the joints, while avoiding additional injury has been a real challenge for me.  Now, I’m not whining – you know I hate whine.  Just stating that I’ve had a few setbacks and am slower at recovering than I ever anticipated.

So, enough about me and my aches and pains.  I’m going to give you a little teaser for my new story over on Storytime.  It’s not as smouldering as some of my previous ones.

Here’s a sample from Oral Dilemma, Part 1.

It was the story of my life. The same thing that always got me in trouble – my mouth.  I stood just off  the stage, shaking inside, so nervous I wasn’t sure I could go through with this. 

“Hey, knock ‘em dead Roxy.”  His hand brushing my shoulder as he eased past me.  Devon Miller, the man I’d crushed on since 6^th grade.  Oh hell, who am I kidding? I’ve had a crush on him since that first day of kindergarten when he shared his fruit chews.  He was instantly my best friend.

We sat at the same table in class.  He rode my bus and we shared a seat because he lived four houses down and we got off at the same stop. We raced our bikes, played in the tree house, skipped stones at the pond and made mud pies.  Then in fourth grade my parents divorced.  I spent half my time with my dad and his flavor of the month. Back home mom worked long shifts at the hospital leaving my sister and me at Devon’s house. We made forts, hunted monsters, played video games and slept on the couch together.  Not that anything happened, we were just kids.

  By the 6^th grade, I’d gained a good amount of weight and was chubby.  That’s when Devon broke my heart the first time.  We were sitting at the edge of the pond skipping rocks when he told me he asked Casey Reynolds to the school dance.  Then he asked if anyone had asked me.  I’m not sure if I was more upset that he asked Casey, or that nobody asked ‘the chubby girl’. 

Anyway, it was the first in a long string of disappointments.  I’ve been a plus sized girl in a size 0 world ever since.  By my junior year I was in a size 16, my double D’s the only thing that got me dates. the rest of me is rather plain Jane nothing special.  My dark hair never gets noticed. My facial features are average.  I wasn’t blessed with thick long lashes, or pretty eyes, or even full luscious lips.  My lips are small, unnoticeable, and completely forgettable.  Although I’ve been called a big mouth for other reasons.  My ‘big mouth’ was always getting me into trouble by saying the wrong things.  I made a smart alec comment to Chad Ramsey, this gorgeous hunk of a soccer player and he challenged me to “put my money where my mouth was”.  He dared me, so it kind of forced my hand.  

Just then who should walk in but Devon with Phoebe Yates draped on his arm.  Phoebe was all of 98 pounds soaking wet. She’d make Taylor Swift look fat standing next to her.   Why I even cared I don’t know but I did.  It pissed me off, big time.  I slammed a glass of Jack and Coke, and told Chad  “I’ll accept your challenge.”

I grabbed Chad’s hand and dragged him to the unoccupied room, his bedroom. Once inside I kissed him hard, walking him backwards to the bed.  I followed him down when his knees hit the edge of the bed.  He scooted up to where his head was on the pillow as I climbed on top of him and straddled him. 

  “You’re really gonna let me?” Chad asked, his eyes huge, a hopeful grin on his face.

I slowly peeled my shirt off over my head and tossed it.  His eyes grew even larger.  I reached behind me to unclasp my bra hearing  the hitch in his breath.  I held the bra in place for a few seconds making him wait.  I nodded slowly, teasing him.  I knew he had a thing for breasts.  He was always flirting with me, I doubt that he even knew what color my eyes were as nothing registered above my tits. Slowly, very slowly I lowered my bra then tossed it on the floor.  I leaned forward teasing him with them, my nipples just barely out of reach of his lips.

If you want to read more go  to Storytime Trysts.

Check it out and let me know what you think of it.

Meanwhile I continue to work back towards what is normal, or at least what is normal for me.  Hopefully,  things will smooth out here pretty soon and I can gain some momentum once again.

Write on my friends, write on.

Inspiring Minds Want to Know

I Won The Most #Inspiring Blog #Award!

I was honored today to learn authorAllison Bruning  chose to award me!  How cool is that?

Allison is the author of Calico and Reflections.

This is a new blog award, pretty cool huh?  Ironic that I am getting these now, as I’ve not been keeping up with the blog recently.    This is encouragement to get back to it.  I will admit, I’ve missed it, and the blogging seems to help me clear my head to be able to focus on my fiction writing. Has anyone out there missed me,  missed my specific brand of sarcasm and wit?  Anyone?  Beuller?

This isn’t my typical post, but then again lately – what’s typical?  Life gets busy sometimes, you know?  I’ve been prepping for a speaking engagement, which was April 27th.  It went quite well.  Last year around this time, and this same seminar – I wrenched my knee and tore the meniscus in my left knee and the interior ligament.  I was more careful this time.

I don’t think the presentation was nearly as dynamic as melting a mannequin with a blow torch but then again, there were no fire hazards.  No props, no fire, just a video clip from ‘The Incredibles’, and PowerPoint pictures of a medieval knight ( Sir Rustalot stayed home this time), a modern knight – a marine; and Ironman! I know, you’re scratching your head wondering how in the world all of that was relevant to the other  but I managed.  You know me – tie together vampires and butterflies, or did you miss that post?

Then I’ve been tackling a home DIY project – might even post some pics of my finished work.  The oldest daughter is getting ready to graduate high school and before planning a party I realized – OMG, I’ve got  to paint the bathroom.  Then upon looking around  -and the hall, oh and the bedroom needs fresh paint.  But, for now I am sticking just with the bathroom and the hallway.

Now, onto the award:  the rules are pretty simple.

1.  Display the award on my Blog.  (check)
2.  Link back to the person who nominated me. (check – link above to Allison)
3.  State seven things about myself. ( oh come on, you guys don’t really need to know this stuff – it’s boring)
4.  Nominate 15 other bloggers for this award  and link to them.  (fifteen????  scratches head bewildered.  Well

I ‘ll see what I can manage)
5.  Notify these bloggers of the nomination and the award’s requirements.

Seven Things About Ellie

1) I often provide comedic relief in public gatherings, and not booked as the live act on stage.  ( I know shocking – you would have never guessed would you?)

2) Ha- here’s one that half the population probably doesn’t know – my eyes are brown.   Wait for it, wait for it – yeah.

3) During Desert Storm, I was a target specialist providing geodetic coordinates for smart bombs for the armed forces of the U.S.  Now, doesn’t it build your confidence to know that I was in charge of guided missiles and Bomb Damage Assessment to report to Washington?

4) When I was 17 I was selected as a Miss Missouri contestant.  I could have taken all those skinny B’s but I was nominated Miss Congeniality instead, so I let them live.

5) One of the many stupid things I did in my youth – I chased tornadoes.  Yes, you read that right – we chased tornadoes with a storm crew out of Oklahoma city for a semester in meteorology.  We took refuge inside a culvert that ran under a driveway, three of us squeezed in there, nearly drowning by the rapid flow of water, gasping and sputtering, and promising that I would never, never , NEVER, do anything so stupid again – ever.   ( That was the last time I rode in the van out in the field.)

6) I don’t really have any phobias, not really super afraid of anything.  I mean, I  have a healthy respect for snakes and insects but not phobic about them.  Two things that absolutely freak me out though, are parasites and octopus.  *cringes*  They are gross to even think about them.

7) I am the youngest daughter of a youngest daughter of a youngest daughter of a youngest daughter. Yeah – figure that one out.

See what I mean?  I’m not a very exciting person.  I mean it’s not like I  bungee jumped – oh wait, I did do that.  Well it’s not like I was in a tornado – oh wait did that one too.   Hmm, well I guess I can’t do too many more of these or I’ll be giving away all my secrets. Can’t have that!  After all, some of the magic of womanhood is the mystery.

I Give This Award To

I know it says to pick 15 people. I’m trying here – give me a break.

1) Cody Martin

2) Vicki Locey

3) Tina Brown

4) Krystol Diggs

5) Elizabeth Delana Rosa

6) Samantha Kay

7) Penelope Price

8) Cassidy Frazee

9) Abyrne Mostyn

10) Cathy Brockman

Little Mary Sunshine

What fun!! It’s great when you win awards!   I’ve won a blog award!!  Cool beans! 

My friend Abyrne Mostyn ( http://abyrnemostyn.com/)   presented me with the Sunshine Award last week, which is presented to those who positively and creatively inspire others in the blogosphere.

Wow!  I am honored that he feels I positively and creatively inspire others.  Haven’t been feeling very inspiring lately, maybe this will kick my derriere in gear. 

Thank you so much Abyrne!   BTW – if  you want a good short read in erotica, Abyrne’s book Swingers is excellent! 

 

As a recipient, I’ve been asked to share some information about myself.  You guys sure you want to know this stuff?  Well, here goes anyways:

Favorite Color:  Red

Favorite Animal:  raccoons and dragons

Favorite Number:  12

Favorite non-alcoholic Drink:  Coffee

Facebook or twitter?  Facebook -  I’m still a novice at twitter.

Passion:  Absolutely.  Life without passion is boring and dull.  In everything have passion.  Passion for  cooking good food, passion for living , passion in pursuing dreams, passion for writing, passion in my relationship. . . . ABSOLUTELY PASSION!

Giving or Getting a present:  Giving.  I just adore surprising my friends and loved ones with gifts.  Sometimes it’s just little things and often not anything extravagant, but it’s a way to express that I care.  Of course, not opposed to getting either but I get great joy in giving.

Favorite Day:  I don’t know, I’ll let you know when it happens. (Alright technically, this isn’t true but I figured I’d throw  out the cliché’ days of wedding and children’s births. I’ve had accomplishments, and good days over the course of my *clears throat* years.  But My favorite day hasn’t happened yet, I have a specific goal in mind.)

Favorite Flowers: Lilacs – A lot of happy childhood memories associated with lilacs.  My mother always had a lilac bush and they are  a sign that spring has arrived.

 

I’d like to take my turn and pass this award on to a couple of aspiring writers who you all wanna be watching out for as I know they are well into some great writing!!

David Alvin – http://heroesdontkill.blogspot.com/

Cody Martin – Resonant Blue - http://codylmartin.blogspot.jp/

Vicki Locey - Thoughts from a yodeling Goat Herder

Giveaway and Cover Art Reveal for Maiden Behind The Mask

My special guest today is Tara Chevrestt.  Tara has had an interesting journey with her cover art woes.  For us it’s amusing but I can also see if I were in her shoes – I’d be so very frustrated. Enough from me I’ll let Tara fill you in on the full story.

 

You know you’ve done something right in the cover art department when you see not one, but two just like it show up on your Facebook or Amazon feed. Only different titles and author names.

*sigh*

When Maiden Behind the Mask was first published, it had a home with a publisher. Now, the image I wanted and put on the art form was declared too expensive. If you’re an author, you’ve been there. With much grumbling and sighing, I searched for stock art images that looked like a Spanish woman in 1800′s Los Angeles (then a part of Mexico) dressed as Zorro.

That saying “looking for a needle in a haystack…”

Yea.

I found a blonde, I found an Asian with way-too-modern bangs, I found lace masks, beaded masks, feathered, masks, women half naked wearing weird masks, pointy-nosed masks, but no women Zorros.

We got as close as we could.

Three weeks later the publisher crashed and people told me I should get new art anyway. The art wasn’t working for them. (If they only knew how very hard it was making that cover…)

I had cover two for a while. It’s a great cover, but it began to irritate me. It would be perfect if my heroine was running around in a lace mask a dress with a pearl belt. Again, it was the closest we could find that was in the budget. The artist did a superb job.

 

Regardless, being the type of person who is just plain irritated by discrepancies in covers—they must match the story!—I made a third cover. It wasn’t a lady Zorro, but a Spanish senorita looking coyly over a fan. Because when Catalina Rodriguez isn’t saving damsels in distress, she’s a lovely senorita…with a lot of mischief up her sleeves…

Oh, I made such a good choice. Everyone loved it…and then I saw it twice more…the exact image with no changes made to it at all. Three identical book covers!

URGH!

But the good news is…that image the publisher said was too expensive? The image I originally wanted…is now my cover.

Who says dreams don’t come true? Perhaps this weird twist of fate was just a nudge toward getting what I originally wanted.

Behold…the new Maiden Behind the Mask artfully created by Christie A. C. Gucker!

 

When Catalina Rodriguez is attacked by a would-be rapist and rescued by the dashing Ricardo Garcia, she not only becomes more aware of the handsome man, but also vows that she’ll never be a damsel in distress again. Using the timeless method of blackmail, she convinces her uncle to teach her to fight and becomes a masked crusader in the night, saving other damsels from robbers and rough handling.

However, scandalous rumors and dwindling funds force Ricardo and Catalina to marry. Not immune to each other’s charms, their marriage starts fiery, but when one of Catalina’s nightly escapades results in dire consequences, she is forced to spurn her husband’s amorous advances…or reveal a secret that could turn him away from her forever.

Ricardo’s not a man to be cuckolded or left in the dark. Is his wife having an affair with El Capitan, the masked savior? If so…they will both pay.

 

Buy on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Kobo

 

Thank you, everyone, for taking this cover art journey with me! DO leave me a comment *with your email address* and tell me which one you like best and why. One lucky commenter from each blog will be given a coupon code to download the book FREE on Smashwords! And yes, you can comment on more than one blog to increase your chances. I’ll be having my trusty canine sidekick choose names from her dog bowl Sunday night, the 31st.

***

Tara Chevrestt is a deaf woman, former aviation mechanic, writer, and an editor. She is most passionate about planes, motorcycles, dogs, and above all, reading. That led to her love of writing. Between her writing and her editing, which allows her to be home with her little canine kids, she believes she has the greatest job in the world. She is very happily married.

Her theme is Strong is Sexy. She shares a website with her naughty pen name: http://tarachevrestt.weebly.com/index.html and they have a Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Tara-Chevrestt-Sonia-Hightower/218383211513877

 

Dream Big Blog Hop – Part 2

Yesterday, I posted my answers to the Dream Big Blog Hop.  Today, I am posting my  partner-in-crime’s answers.

I was invited to take part in the Dream Big Blog Hop.  I was originally scheduled to post on the 20th, but due to a car collision I was rather sedated and unable to attend to my blog, much less anything else for a short time.  Thankfully, I’ve been given a reprieve to go ahead and post this. 

Cody Martin was kind enough to invite me to participate in his Dream Big Blog Hop. Here are the questions and answers.

Writing is largely solitary, and sometimes a lonely endeavor. Sure, you talk to friends, experts for research, discuss what works and what doesn’t with your editor, and bounce ideas off of fellow writers. But in the end it’s one person pounding the keyboard or twirling the pencil. But what if it didn’t have to be completely alone? Who would YOU work with if you could work with anyone on your favorite project?

In this post, that’s what I’m asking. Choose a person for each category and tell why you want to work with them. If you want, feel free to post their picture, a piece of their work, or a link to something about them. The only rule is that the person must still be alive.

Writers dream. Now it’s time to dream BIG.

 

You have the opportunity to hire anybody as your cover artist. If you write children’s books or books that are heavily illustrated, who would you get for the interior artwork?

I really don’t know about artists to be honest, I mean I have always adored the work of Quentin Blake since given Dahl books as a child.I Think the Artisan series could justify a piece of his gorgeous sketch work.  As for Love Notes, I don’t know. I think Oleg Volk or Munger of Larue Tactical could do an amazing job with the weapons photography. I think so much would depend on the book really. I am also very fond of the artwork in Gail Simone’s reimagining of Batgirl post cure so it would really depend on the art style I and the publisher wanted. Although, I would be hugely tempted to contact my old friend Mark Holmes, who taught me what little I know about painting. The man can paint and draw amazingly well and make a painting look like a photo.

Obviously  we have different taste in art.  I’m sure we can come to some sort of agreement though, as long as I get my way.

 

Who would you co-write your next novel with? What genre? Why?

In many ways I have my dream writing partner working on Love Notes.  I mean, we work amazingly well together and Ellie Mack is amazing to write with, and for.   But gosh ,really I have to say other than Ellie, or Cecile Hardy who graciously covers on Storytime Trysts on occasion, I would have to go for Pratchett.  Because, well who wouldn’t want to spend time with an author who has so shaped their lives and their reading and writing style. Though I adore his work, I don’t think I am good enough to write satirical fantasy with him.  But hell, I would have a bloody good go.

Aww,  OK.  After saying such sweet things about me, maybe I’ll let him have a say in the cover art. (I have to agree, I’ve only read a few of Pratchett’s books but he would be amazing to work with.)

 

Your publisher wants to do an audiobook version of your novel and they’re not sparing any expense. Who do you think can narrate your masterpiece?

Oh God, I would love to send it to Fry but his voice is soothing and I would just drift off.

 

They’re really going all out! Your novel is getting a full soundtrack. Who should compose it? If your novel uses a lot of songs, list your compilation here.  

Um, I think it would be a mix of what I wrote it too really; Mitch Benn, the long blondes, Pulp, Voltaire, Avenue Q.   I would just go wild in the country or rather my record collection.

 

Congratulations! Your novel is being turned into a major motion picture. As the creator of the original work, you get to pick the director.

If I am being greedy, Tarantino or possibly Moffat.

Hmmm, again obvious difference of opinion here.  We’ll have to work on that.

 

The director has some ideas on who to cast, but you get to cast one character. What role/character is it and who portrays them?

Sir Oliver in Love Notes portrayed by Alphonso Joseph D’Abruzzo,  just this amazing, breathtaking comic but dark actor who could easily pull off the loved and lost motif I want, plus I could bag an autograph and a martini with him.

Dear Diary I would cast Laura; I’m not quite sure but I would want someone slighty larger than life, someone who makes Siam look small and waifish and who could carry the weight of being sexy and competent, caring and funny.   I have a friend I modeled her on, but I am not naming names, someone who can fill out combats as well as she can a strappy dress.

 

You’ve been hired to write a novel based on a preexisting character or franchise from another medium. Which character or franchise is it?

I think I would go for something in the warhammer 40K franchise.  There is now good no evil only war, a very dark setting for moral soul-searching, to what extent do actions and the ends justify the means, social soul-searching in scifi literature. Plus ,I am a huge fan of the games and books and would love to see my books being read and becoming part of the game world –  this world where everything is slanted and everything has a bias - everything you read could be propaganda.

 

It’s the anniversary of your favorite literary character’s debut. You’ve been hired (yay, work!) to write an anniversary novel. Who is the literary character?

Arsene Lupin – from a series by Maurice Leblanc.  He was the first counterpoint to the detective.  French, a criminal with real style, a gentleman thief.  The french raffles if you will.  He paid homage to another of my favourites the esteemed Sherlock Holmes and I would say, is the first real subversive literary anti-hero.  My love affair began reading a short story where when confronted with a notorious murderer on a train he robs him.  Leaves him bound and gagged for the constables with a note.  He was a subversive criminal but he had a line  and the frankness and charm of the character I found enthralling.  Mugging a notorious murderer and leaving the police a note of thanks and a bank account for the reward to be wired to,  all the while escorting and protecting the wife of a Prison governor that had imprisoned him.  The sheer joy of crime with elegance, with verve and beauty,  it is just a wow moment for a young boy.

Since I used his answer yesterday – as I was totally blank on this one, I shall field this one for you today.
Ramoth from Dragonriders of Pern.   I began Anne McAffrey’s Pern series when I was maybe 14.  I developed a love of her stories, an admiration for her world building before I understood what world building was.   Ramoth is the golden dragon. Ramoth was hatched from Nemorth’s last clutch, the last queen egg on Pern. She mauled two female candidates before Impressing F’lar’s choice, Ruathan-bred Lessa.

The dragons in the Pern world are western dragons, modeled after European legend and myths.  I think it would be intriguing to write things from Ramoth’s perspective.  Ramoth is  a hinge pin in the series.  To tell things from her species, from her perspective would be a challenge, but a delightfully interesting one.  Ruth of course would have to be mentioned, as he is the only white dragon and has some interesting powers of his own.

The Dreaming continues  with Abyrne Mostyn.  Don’t miss it.

Thank you Cody Martin, for including me in this!

(A little bonus blog from my co- conspirator.)

Write on my friends, write on!  When you dream, dream big!

Illogical Thinking

Ever seen a strange phenomenon and heard someone exclaim “There’s got to be a logical explanation.” ?

There are things in this world and out of them, that confound scientific explanations.  There are glowing gaseous balls that hover over the ground in rural fields.  City slickers would freak out over this but  it’s got to do with the methane gasses emitted by the cows that were in that field earlier in the day.

There are lights in the night sky that we don’t know what they are.  Automatically our brains go “Ooh, what if that was a UFO?”
OK, well not everyone’s,  the more practical minded amongst us say “There’s a logical explanation for that.”

Carolyn Keene drew on these “mystical events” like the glowing gas balls to  confound her readers.  It added to the sense of mystery.  Creative people think of “magical” answers.  Logical analyticals think of the sensible scientific explanation.

So, being the perpetual pot stirrer that I am, I did a little scientific experiment at the last  “gathering”.   There was a recent “unexplained ” phenomenon on the news.  I wasn’t the one that brought the subject up but I was the one that perpetuated it.    At first there were sensible, logical explanations thrown out.  Government training maneuvers, top-secret aircraft, weather balloons.  (Really?  Why does everyone always say weather balloon?  Have you ever seen one?    NO, just no.)

I threw out an idea, it was off the wall ridiculous but it got things moving.  It’s amazing , when prompted how bizarre some of the explanations people can come up with.  One particular one by a very logical, rational, engineer type that  rarely  accepts anything  other than scientific proof came up with a rare species of owl that is illuminated by a chemical in its blood akin to a firefly, said chemical allowing him to hunt his prey by his own light.    Not too bad for a stoic engineer.  I could write a story around that! An owl with a glow-in-the-dark butt because lightning bugs are like chocolate to him – it could happen!

Sometimes the illogical is the logical route.  For any creative, we understand the truth in this.  The logical thinking produces the same old stuff that already exists.  But illogical thinking sparks new inventive ideas like the one I got today for a whole new story.  A mad scientist of sorts who has rather unconventional means of experimentation.  But that would be telling, so you’ll have to wait until it’s written so I can show you.

So how’s your Monday?  Who says Mondays are bad, huh?  They are new beginnings, fresh every week, a world of opportunity crammed into a 24 hour period.  What new horizons are in your Mondays?

Write on my friends, and CARPE DIEM!

Hazy Daze of Winter

There I was, minding my own business and I got waylaid by illness.  Yes, I know I’ve told you all about it.  Went over the practical applications to prevent in the future.  What I didn’t discuss is the drug induced haze I’ve been in ever since.  Prescription meds  mind you but they have the same effect.

A  friend recently was having some issues with his pain medications.  The doctors had him on morphine and it wasn’t working for him.  He ended up having a very rough reaction and went through a month of anguish trying to get back to an even keel.  In a similar fashion, though not to the extreme I have been having issues with my prescribed medications to help me get over the pneumonia.

One makes me hyper like I’m an 8-year-old  that consumed twelve redbulls.  Another messes with my hormones and I’ve been on this emotional rollercoaster that I can’t seem to get off of.  It’s like the horror ride in a Scooby Doo cartoon, only for real! One pill makes me feel hyperactive and another makes me feel like I’m in a hazy nightmare, and the third  jerks my emotions around.  *One pill makes you happy and one pill makes you sad, . . . go ask Alice*

I was watching The Help and I”m crying because Mae Mobley is such a neglected child. I mean, sobs!  This is fiction people!  Then, later I was crying with Rutledge when Tanner had opened his car door for him to feel the effects of the tear gas on Top Gear!  that was when I realized it was the medicines affecting my hormones that  are messing with my emotions.  Be glad you’re not living with me right now.

I’ve written words and when I go back over them I think – what on earth was I thinking?  I have two more days of one medication, and today is last day of another.  Hopefully, I will get back to normal soon.  Well, or at least normal for me.

Write on my friends, write on!

Setting the Stage

The beginning of the year is the perfect time for organizing.  A fresh start for the new year, right?  Well my organizing efforts are focused on my writing area. I don’t have an office.  I did for a short while then the hubs moved a tv in there and a leather love seat and it has been the man cave ever since.

I spent many hours on the family pc, but it wasn’t really work conducive, there are people to talk to in the family room. I am a social creature and if there is anyone to talk to I will talk and not work.  Which is part of why I put in earbuds with my tunes to “tune” everything else out.

This year I am setting the stage, or the staging area.  Step one is cleaning off the bookshelf.  In theory it should be easy.  I am removing my fiction books from this bookshelf making the top shelf grammar and writing which includes my thesaurus and dictionary, the second shelf is resource and history books, the third is some miscellaneous books like Writing prompts,  manuscript guidelines and coffee table books I picked up on clearance about Scotland, Celts, druids, and vikings.  I have three magazine holders for the writers magazines I can’t bear to part with.  that will leave enough space for my stack of notebooks and sketch pads.

Step two is the desk itself.  As I pulled out my drawer with hanging files I realized I’ve saved every little scrap of paper that I ever wrote a single note on.  Yes, there are napkins from restaurants in there.  Which explains the sudden urge for pizza.  This daunting task of tackling my files will take at least double the time the bookshelf takes.

Restocking my supplies will come next then finally the decor. I had maps on my office before it became the man cave, so I”m thinking my maps will soon migrate over to my nook.  I’m planning by the end of the month to move my laptop from the family room into this nook to be able to concentrate better.

Will it work?  Time will tell.  If not I’ll be posting the revised plan.  What works for you? What sort of work area do you have?

Write on my friends, write on!

 

Is Love Stronger Than Addiction?

Today is my birthday!  Yay!  * party horns sounding*  While I am out celebrating I thought I’d hand over the reins to a fellow writer.  The subject matter of this post however is not celebratory.  I know people that this applies to whether it’s heroin or another drug.  It’s hard to wrap my mind around the depths of this monster.  Unfortunately, this is a monster that is very real in our culture.  I have family that this applies to and while we struggle to comprehend thier actions, I find myself praying, pleading for their life.  Grab a kleenex and  welcome C. J. West!

During my research for Dinner At Deadman’s I learned a great deal about the power of addiction and the ways people get hooked on powerful narcotics. Every Internet chat room discussion and interview reminded me how addictive heroin is, and how destructive a drug habit is to families and neighbors. In all the sadness, pain, and loss, one story reminded me of the power of love and the strength of our human will.

To truly understand the power of love in this story, we need to start with the monster that is addiction.

The first surprise in my research was that many people who end up hooked on heroin don’t start by experimenting with drugs. It is easy to see intravenous drug users as beneath us and unworthy of our love and support, but many addictions spring from injuries that require prescription pain killers. For many, the end of a prescription leaves them with a psychological if not physiological addiction and they seek relief through alternate means.

They buy unused pills from someone else’s prescription then progress to buying pills stolen from homes and pharmacies. Soon, pills aren’t enough to “get off E” (stop feeling sick). Addicts need more and more of the drug to get through the day without feeling ill. Many addicts rarely get high after using for a long time. They simply need the drug to function. As the need for the drug increases, users progress from pills like Oxycodone to shooting heroin intravenously.

At this point, the physical need is so strong that users will do anything for the drug. The desperation is hard to fathom. Imagine something so powerful you’d kill for. So powerful you’d get on your knees and beg for. Something you need so badly you’d give your body to anyone who asked if they promised you money to buy it.

One of the most difficult aspects of writing this book for me was creating realistic scenarios with my drug culture characters. After sitting across the table with family members and hearing the desperate and dangerous things addicts will do for the drug, writing these scenes sometimes made me feel physically ill because I knew they were playing out every day across the world.

When I was nearly finished with the book, and really struggling to come to terms with this problem, I remembered the story of a woman I’d met years ago. She married and had two kids with a man who later became addicted to heroin. We worked together and over the years I heard story after story of the problems he caused her.

He stopped working and continually stole from family members. He sold their electronics even after she’d thrown him out of the house. He broke into the houses of relatives, stole their cash, sold their electronics. He drove the children around town while he was high.

This story played out in real time for me. If she’d asked my advice it would have been to divorce him and keep him away from the children. But year after year she struggled to provide for the family on her own. She raised her children by herself and encouraged her husband to get help. Years later when he’d recovered and moved back in, I was in awe of her love, strength, and commitment, to see her marriage through such a tumultuous time.

You will see a glimpse of this woman in my character Cynthia during Dinner At Deadman’s. She shows surprising compassion in one key scene given the circumstances. I hope you’ll give the book a try and see drugs and addiction in a new light.

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C.J. West is the author of seven suspense novels including The End of Marking Time and Sin and Vengeance, which was optioned into development for film by Beantown Productions, LLC (screenplay by Marla Cukor). C.J. blogs at http://www.cjwestkills.wordpress.com. You can also find him at http://www.22wb.com or at http://www.facebook.com/cjwestfans

We’re All Mental

Let’s face it we are our own worst enemy!  I know there are many of us with this affliction.  We try to hide it, keep it under lock and key but the strange thing is others can often recognize it before we can see it in ourselves.  It robs us of simple pleasures, prevents us from participating in life and hinders us from stepping outside of our box.

We play these mental games with ourselves, then either pander ourselves out of doing things or admonishing ourselves for our failings.  Sickos – all of us!  Shame, shame, shame!

What is it? Anxiety Disorders.  OK, you may not be fully diagnosed with it but we all have various stages of this budding affliction.

I am notoriously one who is daring, willing to try things.  Bungee jumping, parasailing, snorkeling, spelunking – ok won’t be doing that one again any time soon, and even rapellng are not things for the faint of heart.  Instead of giving into peer pressure, I was the kid your parents warned you about.  Yes, I did daring stupid things.  Yes, I jumped off a roof.  Yes, I took a dare more often than I gave them.  but as I’ve gotten older and become responsible for the lives of others (parenting changes you – it really does), I’ve detected a line of thinking that is akin to an anxiety disorder.

My 17 year old daughter is getting ready to begin her senior year in high school – yeah!  Go Sarah!  However today she is nearly in a panic, because of the unknown.

She stated it like this: “When you’re going to do something that you’re nervous about it, it’s best to just do it and not think about it.  Sort of like getting on a roller coaster, you don’t think about the physics of the design of the roller coater, or the g-force, or how dangerous it is.  You just look at it and think – ooh, fun!”

Yeah, if we all could remember that!  However, when we face a new challenge our brains go into high gear and we over anazlye the situation, adding the terifying what ifs.   Choosing a new hairstyle, starting a new phase like starting college, starting a new job, making a career change, gonig to a different gym, taking a different route to work, they can all be intimidating.  Personally, I don’t think it’s a matter of anxiety disorder but fear.  It’s scary to step out sometimes but as you talk yourself out of it, you convince yourself it’s scary and not worth trying, therefore next time it’s easier to stay in your box.  Before you know it, the box has shrunk and your stuff has an inch of dust on it.

Yep, you know it, I’m a box smasher!  I come in like a tornado and rearrange the furniture, move your stuff, shift things “6 inches to the right”; sometimes tearing out an entire wall to expand a wing.  For those who think I never get scared – get real!  I just do it afraid.

Fake it till you make it, or never let them see you sweat. Either one works.  I know a person however, that over the years has let themseves be overwhelmed by the smallest of things, allowing their box to close in so that it’s such a cramped little affair there’s barely room to turn around.  It’s sad, really.

Now there are individuals who really do have anxiety disorders.  I have some of the symptoms that I will list below, but I don’t let it dominate my mind.  I ain’t dead yet, and I’ve got a lot more life to live.  In fact, I intend to live mine out loud!  If you’re not so bold and brazen maybe you could start with baby steps.  Wear a different color; it can be a huge shock to the system.  Smile at someone you don’t know – I know, shocking.  Try a new food – I don’t know, that could be risky.  Read this blog – omg  – we may be moving a little too fast.  One step at a time!

My point is that as we get older we are more prone to settle into routines. Routines then become ruts and before long the rut is a grave with the ends knocked out.  We allow worries and fears to dominate our thinking and before long we accept failure because we are afraid to try.  I don’t want to be that person.  It’s humorous to watchMr. Monk, but  in reality it would be a sad existence.  I know from personal aquaintance, the above mentioned person’s box is beginning to resemble a coffin.

So here’s what WEbMD has to say about it:

What Are the Symptoms of an Anxiety Disorder?

Symptoms vary depending on the type of anxiety disorder, but general symptoms include:

• Feelings of panic, fear, and uneasiness
• Uncontrollable, obsessive thoughts
• Repeated thoughts or flashbacks of traumatic experiences
• Nightmares
• Ritualistic behaviors, such as repeated hand washing
• Problems sleeping
• Cold or sweaty hands and/or feet
• Shortness of breath
• Palpitations
• An inability to be still and calm
• Dry mouth
• Numbness or tingling in the hands or feet
• Nausea
• Muscle tension
• Dizziness

I’m sure we can all recognize some of those symptoms but it doens’t mean we need to run out and get a prescription for Xanax.  I rebel against the pharmaceutical companies need to overmedicate the world population when all we need to do is put on our big girl/ big boy pants and live life – to the fullest measure experiencing everything it can throw our way!  Just dodge the tomatoes.

Yeah, and some call me an adrenaline junkie as well!  It doesn’t matter though, I’m having a blast.

Write on my friends, write on!