I’m Still Here


It’s been a while since I’ve posted and for that, I do apologize.

I’m still here!

Life has me going 200 miles per hour with my hair ablaze! I’m behind schedule on my editing and the client is not happy in the least. Can’t say I blame her.

A contract job that I took has morphed from a simple revision to a full-blown disaster that requires a great deal of time. This  has turned into a bleeding nightmare that I can’t seem to stop the hemorrhaging! I will be SOOOO glad to be done with this. This is also the reason that the above editing is behind schedule.

My own writing has been nonexistent, set aside in order to fulfill my  obligations to the above two demands on my time. This does not make my creative muse happy in the least. NOT. IN. THE. LEAST.

NOT. IN. THE. LEAST.

My family is falling apart around me. My oldest sister is  stressed to the max with  things going on in her life, and stress has landed her in the hospital numerous times before.  The younger sister, still older than me recently  was hospitalized with her health issues that are critical.

My oldest brother who has disassociated himself from me, I thought  it was the whole family but then found out that apparently, it is just me, has prostate cancer and glaucoma.

My other brother, still older than me – yes, I am the baby. I’ll always be the baby. I will be 75 freaking years old and still be the baby. – hs had some medical issues with his kidneys and  some other issues.

For the most part, I am healthy.  I need to shed  weight – a lot of weight, I  am learning to live with back injuries from a car accident several years ago, but I am healthy.  I’d like to keep it that way.

However, having said that I  am feeling the strain of too many irons in the fire. Between a contract job, editing job,  our home business, trying to  build a writing career, and maintain the rest of my life –  I think I’m losing it.

My  mind is like a Fourth of July fireworks display alight with ideas.  I want to write! I want to get the ideas down while I have them. but I can’t justify taking the time away from  the edits of which I am already behind.  I can’t  make myself write when I have a deadline for this course manual to be completed  either.

I feel like I am being stretched in twenty different directions, like everything is falling between the cracks and I will never escape the maddening pressure! I am beyond full capacity. I need a vacation, a serious vacation.  A vacation that doesn’t require me to cook the meals, or make the bed, or clean the house, or . . . . . is there a vacation plan  where you can just be a slug? That’s the plan I need.  The sea slug plan, booked at a hotel right on the beach, where the only thing required is for me to don enough clothing  to not scare away the small children and bask in the sun while listening to the waves. Better yet, one of those places that has the cabana boys that bring the drinks right to you. That’s what I need.  A hotel on the beach,  cabana boys bearing drinks, and a chase to lay on so that I’m not confused for a beached whale.

Until I can find that plan,  the stress continues. Reluctantly I  return to the editing cave.

I am determined to get these off of my desk. Currently, I have no wheels so I am  trapped in the cave. I may have to call out for pizza to be delivered.  I have to ease the suffering somehow, right?

I promise more next time. Go out there and have some fun –  live – enjoy the sunshine – do something exciting.

Write on my friends, write on!

Ellie

 

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6 comments on “I’m Still Here

  1. Again with the parallel lives…sheesh. I’m about one more fire away from the loony bin. Hang in there sunshine and check out Robert’s Grove Beach Resort in Belize. No cabana boys, but it sits right on the ocean and may be reasonably priced.

    Like

    • Belize. . . sounds amazing. I will definitely look into that.Thank you for the tip!
      ON a positive note, I finally got that last edit sent! I feel a celebration in is order. But first, I have to finish this manual out the door as well.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s good to hear from you. I can’t begin to imagine the stress you’re going through: editing, contract work, running a home business. The stress I have is working two jobs, cleaning the house, and being a chauffeur. That doesn’t leave much time for the writing I prefer to do, which is working on short stories. In the meantime, I have my journal on my phone, though I bought a comp book so I could start writing by hand again.

    Best of luck with all the stuff that’s going on. Hope you get that vacation sometime soon.

    Like

    • Thanks! I’m trying to be more efficient with my time.
      I am not going to take on any new irons to put in the fire and as I wrap up a job or project, I’ll be cutting down so that I can focus. However, there are seasons when everything hits at once.
      My handwritten journal is the one thing I would attribute to helping keep my sanity, or what little of it remains. LOL
      Once upon a time I had mad organization skills. I”m not sure where those went.

      Like

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