Laugh Out Loud!

A news report that I heard this morning stated that Doctors at Washington University have release scientifically documented cases where laughter is very good medicine indeed.  I’ve known this for years!

While the serious-minded folks around me are working on permanent creases in their foreheads and raising their blood pressure, I approach life in a little less orthodox manner.  One of my Facebook friends recently commented about posting LOL. “Do people really laugh out loud?”

I do.  Often in fact.  I laugh at odd times, at unconventional things, and sometimes at very awkward situations.  I laugh when I’m nervous, and when I’m not.  I laugh at funny movies. Unfortunately there aren’t that many that are actually funny.  My life is like a Carol Burnett rerun, and sometimes like the Three Stooges.

These doctors have scientific proof that laughter reduces cholesterol levels, blood pressure and decreases your blood sugar levels.  Really? I have low blood pressure, low cholesterol and no diabetes despite being overweight.  I’ve told people for years to lighten up, but do they listen? Of course not.  Here pull my finger!

Sometimes the idiocy that is our lives can become overwhelming.  You can laugh or you can cry.  I prefer laughing.  Looking for the funny side is a choice.  It’s not easy at times, but when things become just so insanely overwhelming what am I going to do about it?  Debbie Downer is no fun and I don’t want to be her.  IN fact I try not to be around her.

I don’t want to get into a lot of psycho-babble about our temperaments and predetermined biological DNA as to why people are the way they are.  Although I think the shock of actually experiencing a good belly laugh might send some to the emergency room, or at least to the doctor’s office for medications, laughter is a good thing that grownups have forgotten how to do.

What makes you laugh?  For me it’s a variety of different things.  I laugh at my own mistakes, and my own ignorance.  I laugh at funny videos. I laugh at good jokes and even some corny stupid jokes.  I laugh at Mony Python and even the Stooges.  Slapstick is funny stuff!

My point is, don’t take yourself or life too seriously. None of us get out of here alive so why not kick back and enjoy the ride at least sometimes?  Surely there is something that you can find humor in.  If not, maybe see the doctor for some meds that make things seem funny.  I hear that stuff the dentist uses can be pretty good.  Mine uses needles, and I avoid him as much as possible.

When you can laugh so loud you snort, you’ve almost gotten there.  When you almost pee your pants  you are well on your way on the laugh track.  When you spray the person across the table with your soda, you make others laugh.  It’s a good thing I don’t embarrass easily.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it:  LAUGH OUT LOUD!

Wonder Underdog

We Are Who We Are

Y’all are just too wonderful!  I’ve got to give a shout out to my soul sista – Satin Sheet Diva, my partner in crime – Cathy Brockman; my supporters Raymond Frazee, Penelope Price,  Madison Johns, Ben Hannigan,  and Linda J. Alexander.  You guys rock!

Thank you all for the wonderful support when I was feeling so frustrated yesterday.

Quick recap:

• coffee this morning – ah!!!
• headache is gone but that’s a bad sign when fasting for blood work makes my blood sugar plummet to the point of causing a headache
• poked holes in my arm are fading, and the one is only slightly bruised.
• I’ve decided (with the husband’s voice of reason) that perhaps this year it would do well for me to avoid the family gathering. As he put it:  “You know how they are going to be.  It’s just a matter of how quickly they get there.  Then the rest of the time is spent with them sitting around discussing their ailments.  I don’t really think it’s a very good atmosphere for you, the kids or me.  We have somewhere else to be that day, even if it is just at home.”   REASON #7894 why I love this man.

My own convictions for improved health demands that I continue along the safe but slower path that I am on.  I have made progress in that by the way – I went from a tight size 24 probably should have been in a size 26 to buying size 16.  Still a long way to go, but I’m getting there slowly but surely.  Still, not quite ready to share any bikini pictures.  There are some things the world just doesn’t need to see.

I discovered this morning that my swim instructor had a roux en Y bypass five years ago.  She asked what was going on, and I shared about my sister calling me  and telling me she was going to have the sleeve bypass on Monday.  She pipes up and says ” Oh, I had a gastric bypass three years ago. Best decision I ever made.”  I said nothing else about it.  I will tell you that the instructor is around 230.  NOT good advertisement for the procedure to me.  Just saying!

I have decided that my friends are right.  I’m doing the right thing.  It’s about so much more than just losing the weight.  Last week I had my doctor’s visit and I am happy to report my cholesterol is fine.  My blood pressure  – 120/64 is fine.  No diabetes, or arthritis.  the knee is healing nicely.  so other than carrying too much weight, and having this obsession with writing – I’m healthy.

If I had the money to do the procedure as an elective surgery I still wouldn’t do it.  I might hire Jillian to whip my butt into shape, or Dolvett Quince.  I promise not to give a bunch of lip while he’s training me!  then I’d spend the rest of my surplus money on new clothes!  A girl’s got to look good regardless of the size she wears.  I could rock it in a size 24, I can certainly rock it on the way down to wherever I land. *hand raise with a snap*

It’s about the attitude honey.  Sassy sista gonna strut her stuff and feel GOOD about it too! Uh huh!  Gonna work this body, demanding more from it.  Push myself a little harder and a little longer, each time to improve my cardio. Mmm, hmm that’s right. *head snap*  My inner diva is about to show up on the scene, slim and sexified!

Between Zumba fit, the cycling, the swimming, and occasionally other cardio machines and the hiking – I can just feel the fat melt away now!

To borrow Penelope’s word – my “fierce” inner diva steps up to handle the situation and sets my whimpering whining self-pity  woose down for a firm talking to.  Let me tell you, nobody can pop a hip like a sista bent out of shape.

Just so you know, I approach everything with the same intensity – full throttle!  It’s the only speed I know until I run out of gas.  Yesterday I was out of gas.  My tanks are full, and I’ve added some nitro (insert evil laugh here).

I feel ten times better about myself than I did when I weighed my highest weight.  I’m gaining confidence, and when my friend’s make such kind statements – me fierce – gotta love that! – then I feel compelled to live up to that.

No more whining!  Maybe some wine but not whine!  Write On my friends, Write ON!

Freaky Friday

Not the movie,  It has been my day.  First thing this morning storms moving through the area.  Exciting thing driving through hail.  Storm chasers were staying at the hotel next to the gym, and two of the guys were talking about it what they suspected the storms were going to do.  Way to  set a tone of apprehension for the day guys – thanks for that!

Electricity was off when I returned home so no computer – nice.  Starting to panic about not having my seminar notes printed, and my power point is still incomplete.   My phone was nearly dead from listening to my music on the phone instead of mp3 player, and everything I thought I would do to take my mind off the panic rising within me required the use of electricity.

The storm passed, with another on its heels to arrive within a couple of hours.  Great!  I can get in a couple of hours work and wrap this up before it arrives.  Isn’t it funny how things never quite work how you plan?  Distractions just seem to jump out sometimes and even though they may be opportunities, I was on a tight schedule here.  Never the less, I succumbed to the distraction.

Did I mention before that I’m speaking on getting control over your emotions as part of my presentation?  Yeah, well I got excited about an opportunity to travel to France.  A beautiful Chateau, very reasonably priced, a paradise waiting for me.  I started calculating –  we could so do this!  What a wonderful vacation to give our girls before they head off to college.  Then I started adding the other travel expenses like airfare.  OUCH!  I had been at the pinnacle of the rollercoaster, you know that peak of the  climb where you seem to just hang in stillness for a few seconds?

Well, the plunging ride down that slope to the crash at the bottom knocked the breath out of me.  I hit rock bottom and I hit hard.  maybe it’s the intensity I’ve been working at this for the last few days, or even the months I’ve put into the planning but I crashed and burned.  My elation was replaced by a pit of despair as I ran the numbers in my head, and ran through the necessary expenses, and the practical things we should spend that kind of money on instead of being frivolous.  I heard my husband’s voice of reason and got angry with him because I knew what he would say and what his reaction would be.

MInd you, this was a one person rollercoaster ride.  It was a complete debate, argument, reasoning session within my own head.  Strange maybe but I’d be willing to bet that everyone has done this on more than one occasion.  HIs irrational imagined response made me furious, because I knew after so many years of marriage exactly what he would say.  How else do you make a good case to present such an opportunity in the first place?

Finally with a feeling of hopelessness, I gave up on the vacation idea and resumed working on my presentation.  I had to go over it just one more time to be prepared.  I had to laugh at my own reactions.  Here I was going to speak on managing your emotions and I was a perfect example of what NOT to do.  Oh brother!  I hung my head in my hands, wondering what on earth ever possessed me to think I could have something worthwhile to say to anyone. There was no getting out of this now – unless the tornado came through.

I became suddenly aware of the time that I had wasted and the fact that it was time to get the kids from school  My daughter has her permit, and I let her drive.  Trust me when I tell you that facing an audience feeling unprepared is nothing  compared to the terror of my daughter behind the wheel. IN a distance of 10 miles, we had 4 near misses.

She said “I like it better when Daddy rides with me, he doesn’t yell at me.”

Maybe not, but he’s not stressed about speaking at a seminar!  He’s also an easy-going kind of guy.  I wanted to kiss the ground when I got out of the car.

We unloaded body parts from the car and carried them into the house.  the mannequin was unassembled and I had to figure out how she went together and find some clothes for her.  Lusty wench only wore a banket around her when I retrieved her, not to mention where her detached hand was when I collected her parts.  At least Sir Rustalot was a gentleman and kept his armour on!

The storms are dissipating so there’s no help from that front – no pun intended.  Looks like I’m going to have to go through with this thing after all.  I decided I better print out my notes before I forget  aaaaannnnnnnddddd – we’re out of ink – lovely!

The rest of my evening will be running into town for an ink cartridge, returning home to load a knight and his, um I use the term lady loosely here, into the car, dig out the flame thrower, find those black cloths, and somewhere in there manage to prepare dinner for my family.  I’m sure I will be up late stressing over the printed notes searching for errors, and places where I can cut and add, continually editing.  Who knows what will actually come out tomorrow!

Someone said they may record the seminar.  I may have to get a copy just to find out what I said myself.  If nothing else maybe they’ll like my jokes.  If not, I’m wearing my New Balance shoes so I can run really fast!