Pioneer to Extreme Sports II


If you missed the first  part, you can read it HERE.

We left off with Hank just about to tell us about  removing the roof.

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II.  The Roof Surfer

“The plan was simple.  Pull the roof off; add reinforcements,  build a second floor, then put on a new roof.  Nothing to it. It was going to be easy money.  Except for her.”

Hank continued to recount the incident as he  enjoyed his meal.  The chains were attached to the roof and the other end was attached to his pickup truck.  When Hank gave the signal, Mary would drive forward and pull the roof off.  That’s when things went horribly wrong.

As Hank worked, securing the chains and removing the last few nails, his wife’s pregnant state was causing an urgent need for bladder relief.  Exchanges were made several times back and forth as she became increasingly restless.

“Now?” Mary yelled up to Hank.  It was the fifth time.  He was giving one final check to the bolt fastening the chains together.  He made a forward motion with his two fingers above his head while he tugged on the chain and yelled  “In a minute!”

Mary interpreted that as the signal.  She hoisted herself into the truck, started the engine and slowly eased up on the clutch.  Hank was straddling the peak, tightening the nut when he felt the tension in the chains.

The roof slid off the house as smoothly as planned.  Hank riding it to the ground had not been part of the plan.  Without even so much a s a backward glance Mary shut the truck off, jumped out and ran to the neighbor’s house where the family that owned the house was staying.  It was that neighbor who noticed Hank lying on the ground beside the roof, motionless.  Three fractured ribs, a dislocated shoulder and a broken collar-bone prohibited Hank from being able to complete the job or earn income from the work he’d already completed.  It also prevented him from earning any income for weeks from his regular job or side jobs.

He calmly sipped his coffee telling the story as if it  were nothing.

“Wait,  you mean you rode the roof to the ground and she just ran in the house and didn’t bother to  look?”  I asked in disbelief.

“Nature called.  She had to go.”  He calmly  cut into his  country fried steak.

“Were you planning to signal her from the roof?  What did she think was going to happen?”

He patted my hand in  a gentle grandfatherly manner. “Sweetheart,  I take it you’ve not been pregnant before.”

“Well, no I haven’t but” the look of horror on my face must have  had him disconcerted.

“It’s all fine.  We managed through that and worse.”  He gave a knowing nod and went back to his meal.”

Stay tuned to more of this fascinating man’s true life experiences.

Write on my friends, write on!