Romance 101


Welcome readers to Week 19 of the MFRW Blog hop.

Week 19: My Most Romantic Memory

Do you have any idea how difficult it is for a guy to romance a romance author? Hmmm?  Seriously,  how does any man ever compete against our book boyfriends?

OK, so I’m not really a mushy, gushy type of gal with frilly lace around my house with romantic decor, the rooms filled with soft mood inducing elements.  In fact, I’m a bit of a slob if truth be told.  As I look around at the moment,  I need to do some serious houseleaning.  But that’s another story.
Plus,  this isn’t my first rodeo. We’ve been married for almost 33 years.
I could list so many things in that amount of time, not to mention the 6 years we dated before tying the knot!
I remember our first kiss like it was yesterday,  but I have to say it pales in comparison with the deep passionate kisses now.
I remember our first time, . . . well, you know.  We were young, clumsy, neither of us knew what we were doing. But now, bow chicka wow wow!
But, passion is not the same as romance.

Romance is so much more than a hot date that ends with sex! Romance is being pursued.  It’s connecting, caring deeply in such a way that he makes me know that I am his heart! 

How can I pick just one thing?
My husband is an engineer.  He overthinks most things. He’s not Mr. Romance. BUT, he’s got such a wonderful heart and he gets me.  He loves me despite my bad habits,  my insecurities, and struggles. It’s so hard to pick just one thing or event.
I think the most romantic thing he has ever done for me is forgiving me.  We were very near divorced a few years back. I was done, fed up, hurt.  He never cheated on me – I want to make that clear.  It was other things.  We weren’t connecting,  we weren’t being considerate of each other, and in my hurt I was angry.  So very angry.
I wasn’t nice to him at all. Yet,  he was willing to go to marriage counseling,  bare his soul in front of someone else in order to work things out. We both had some changes to make  and my husband was better at it than me.  I was all for talking about the actions but when the counselor wanted to address underlying issues. . .  it took a long while before I opened up.
At the time I had shut him out but he wooed me back.
I Know it may not seem romantic to some people,  but changing a lifetime of habits is difficult. We had to change some elemental behaviors, both of us. The fact that he was willing to change for me when there was nothing really wrong with him, to begin with, . . . well to know that someone loves you so much they are willing to sacrifice everything else,  that’s LOVE.
Fictional characters never stink up the bathroom, they don’t leave their clothes on the floor, or their plates on the table.  They don’t have bad breath or get sick.  They don’t say the wrong thing at the wrong time and fictional characters don’t share our physical space.   BTW,  it’s not just the men that are guilty of these things. I’m sure the men could add a few more things to that list.
In real life, I found my Prince. Real life love trumps any fictional romance every time. We’ve been together for  39 years between dating and marriage –  I think we may have figured out a thing or two.

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This is us!
I am blessed to have him in my life! He’s my best friend!
You can check out what the other authors are saying HERE.
Write on my friends, write on!

First Love #MFRW


Welcome to week 42 of the 52-week MFRW blog hop – My First Love. Wow – do you realize there are only ten -TEN weeks left in the year??? Holy moly where did the time go?

My first love . . . hmmm. Does that mean the first man I fell in love with?  That would be my husband of 32 years, and we dated for 6 years before that.

Does it mean my first love as in God and Jesus? That should be all of our first loves, but I don’t really think that is what it is referring to in this blog hop. Although, if you are writing Christian romance for Steeple Hill, then I guess that would be a suitable topic.

OR does it mean my first love in reading? Sometimes I get confused as to what the intent was for these prompts, like the week about the open door, yeah I totally missed that one!

I need to think over a cup of joe while I sort this out in my head. In the meantime,  you can listen to this:

Alright, coffee consumed and I think I will share about my first love – my hubby. After all, our view about romance and how romance works is filtered through our own perceptions. I will be breaking a rule by sharing this because the hubs doesn’t like for me to talk about him, or us, on the blog.

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I was fifteen years old when I was crushing on this gorgeous hunk. Muscles, oh my! Ripped abs, bulging biceps, but not too bulky. His voice – a deep rich baritone, think Lou Rawls!

His sexy grin sent shivers down my spine before he ever cast a look in my direction. He was the Captain of his football team, I was a band geek. I never thought in a million years he would even look my way and was speechless when he asked me out. Please understand, for me to be speechless is a feat!

He had a full head of thick luscious hair, and back in the 80’s, his hair brushed his shoulders. Our first 3 dates were Friday night – school dance, Saturday night – my school dance, and Sunday – a bowling outing with our youth group from church.

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I was a goner from the first kiss. Man, can he kiss! The kind of toe-curling, knee popping, my insides turn to mush kiss.

This is one of my favorite photos of the hubs, taken long before we were married. He had been working on his car – a 64 Chevy Impala SS, you can see he’s inside the engine compartment and had been laying on the ground beneath the car.  He wasn’t too thrilled with my photography, but I just love this shot!

But, you know . . . true love is more than the physical relationship. We connected. We talked. We shared common interests while maintaining individual interests. He still loves sports, I don’t. I still love the creative crafty stuff, he is meh.

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We’ve had our share of ups and downs, highs and lows. This year has been a lot of lows, but through it all, he’s been my rock. I don’t know that I could have made it through all this cancer stuff if he hadn’t been my biggest supporter, encourager, hand holder, chauffeur, and above all, my best friend.  He was willing to shave his head with me for support!

He puts up with all of my quirks. I’ve put on a lot of weight since we first began dating and he’s rarely complained. If anything, he encourages me to be healthy and regularly tells me I can do it!

True love goes so far beyond the physical attraction, it’s difficult to put into words for the younger crowd. When you find someone who loves you and wants to be with you even though they know your flaws, your hang-ups, and every one of your bad habits. . . . that is true love and worth hanging onto.

This is the kind of love that inspires me to write love stories,  to write romance. This is what inspires me to face the next day when I’m tired of being a pincushion, tired of Dr’s offices, and tired of facing yet another change caused by cancer.

We aren’t wealthy financially by any means, but when I count my blessings,  I feel I am the richest woman alive to have found my Mister Right!

Sure, he has flaws. He’s human after all but they are easily overlooked when looking at the big picture. The big picture for me is a life full of happy memories,  two beautiful children, a loving home, and my best friend to grow old with!

I’m curious to see what the other authors have done with this prompt, so let’s go check them out.

Write on my friends, write on!